Inside the heart and mind of Tim Emery

The other day, I posted an honest question on my Facebook page, "How can good Christians spend $23M promoting discrimination against gays but not feeding the hungry, caring for the sick, or sheltering the homeless?"  Wow.  Talk about creating a firestorm.

My question wasn't meant to be judgemental, though in retrospect, I can see how it could come across that way.  I meant it as a restatement of the popular cliche of a question, "What would Jesus do?"

I'd like to admit a personal bias:  in my walk as a Christian, my focus has been on the words and teachings of Jesus as recorded in the Gospels.  That's not to say I ignore the rest of the New Testament, but I figure if something was really important, Christ would have clearly stated it as with all of His teachings.  He was often asked by the religious community, "What are the most important commandments/principles/things I need to do to inherit eternal life?"  I wonder if we have strayed from the fundamental principles He stressed time and time again.

When I read the Gospels, I see so many parallels to our current conversations regarding religion.  The Pharisees and Sadducees were the religious leaders of the day.  They knew the Scriptures inside and out, and they lived their life by the strict letter of the Law.  They piously dictated how others were to live their lives, and righteously judged those who fell short.  And yet, who did Jesus regularly condemn?  Was it the prostitutes, the lepers, (the gays,) or any other outcast group?  No.  Actually, those were the people He spent time reaching out to with love and grace.  Instead, it was the self-righteous religious leaders who missed the SPIRIT of the law that received the brunt of His wrath.

I would love to have an honest conversation with any Christian who can read Matthew 25:31-46 and still justify to me the priorities of the modern Religious Right political movement.  "Then He will say... 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire...  For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat.  I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink.  I was a stranger and you did not invite me in.  I needed clothes and you did not clothe me.  I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me...  I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do it for me.'"  

But Lord, we built magnificent churches and temples in your honor!  We paid our pastor a decent salary so he wouldn't have to work outside the church!  We passed laws and constitutional amendments to keep gay people from getting married!  We defined America as a Christian nation, kept God from being eliminated from our country, and founded a political movement in your Name!

With millions dying from starvation, genocide, disease...

With millions without proper shelter or clothes...

With all of the challenges in this world...

What would Jesus do?  No, really.  What would Jesus, if He were walking on this Earth today, make His top priorities?  I'm not making a judgement.  That's God's purview, not mine.  I certainly have my own opinions on the question, but it's just meant to provoke honest consideration and discussion among those who strive to follow Christ's teachings.

I welcome your thoughts.

A new friend encouraged me last night to begin my blogging adventure by sharing what it's like to be a gay man in San Diego, CA trying to plan my October wedding.  I've been at it for what, 3 weeks now?  Talk about an emotional roller-coaster already!

The whole idea of marriage is a bit new for me.  I never really thought about it, because it was never an option until the end of May.  Jae and I have been domestic partners (marriage-light) for years now.  Since we've had the commitment for awhile, what's the big deal about getting married?  Now, I'm a pretty practical guy, so I was like, let's go to the courthouse, get the license, and have a justice of the peace perform a quiet ceremony with just the two of us.  About $100, and poof! we'd have all the legal protections of marriage.

Jae, on the other hand, is more of a romantic.  He wants a "real" ceremony... no fancy Bridezilla kind of thing, but something classy with our family and friends.  I can see his point, but our families and many of our friends are scattered across the country, so logistics get a little more complex trying to coordinate the big event.

Our first challenge was picking a date.  We wanted to get married before the upcoming vote in November, in case CA's voters choose to write discrimination into the state constitution and rescind the rights of its gay and lesbian citizens to marry. 

We first chose November 1 to give us as much planning time as possible.  We called the various members of our families, except for Jae's mom, who was on a 2 week vacation.  Everything looked good, and we start making plans.  You see this coming, right?  Yep, Jae's mom gets back, and we find out that she's going to be out of the country.  Back to square one.  It's cool, though.  We were pretty quickly able to set the new date for October 4.  Woo-hoo!  1 step down, a million more details to go.  :-)

So far, we haven't mapped out the actually wedding ceremony.  We're both very spiritual but not religious, so it's not going to be a typical, traditional format.  More than anything, we want it to be a celebration with our family and friends.  Hmmmm...

The biggest disappointment so far is that neither my dad nor Jae's dad are coming.  My dad's Southern Baptist, and Jae's dad is Mormon.  Neither thinks gay marriage is right according to their religious beliefs.  Who knew Baptists and Mormon had so much in common?  Actually, I understand their discomfort with the whole idea and respect their right to their beliefs, though I don't agree with their decision.  I'm sad that they won't be there to celebrate with us, but I guess it's better that they not bring that kind of negative energy to the party.

So, the cool thing is that we're having the ceremony and reception up at the Grand Pacific Palisades resort where we own a timeshare.  We have a whole block of 1 and 2 bedroom condos so that our guests can have a little mini-vacation and have fun hanging out together - and not have to drive anywhere after the reception.  We going to get in so much trouble.  haha